I'll like Nickelback when hell freezes over.
2004-01-26 // 5:28 p.m.

I'm sorry, but did I wake up in fucking Siberia today? No. Really. It is currently -35 degrees Celsius outside, and God knows what the windchill factor is. Maybe I'm being a baby, but fuck class. I would rather be locked in a room with Clay Aiken with no instruments of torture or destruction then venture outside my house today. Can someone please check to see if hell has in fact frozen over? I'd like to be forewarned if I'm going to suddenly start liking Hillary Duff so that I can take the appropriate suicidal measures.

Alright. Enough bitching about how cold I am. My friends all went to the Nickelback concert the other night. I was the only one that didn't go, as I think Nickelback is the most generic, middle-of-the-road band I've ever heard. On top of this, Chad Kroeger really grates my cheese. He's got this whole holier-than-thou attitude, which I suspect comes from the fact that he looks like Jesus Christ. Point is, he's a prick and I hate him. I don't care if he is the Messiah. It's no excuse for piss poor music.

They came back, and Chuck was looking as though he'd had a fucking religious experience, and he proceeded to mock the fact that I didn't get to go to the concert, as though it hadn't been my choice. "Chuck," I said, "if I had wanted to waste $55, I would have put it in the toilet and flushed. It would have been more musically pleasing to the ear."

Later on, he turns to me and says, in words that I've heard Kroeger himself speak, "You may not like them, but you have to admit, they're really talented."

"First of all, they're not "really talented", because they're unoriginal. They're a rip-off of Creed, who in turn are a rip-off of Pearl Jam. Technically speaking, they may be able to play their instruments well, but song-wise, they might as well be a fucking glorified cover band."

"And secondly?" He asks.

"What?"

"You said "First of all...", what's your second point?"

"Oh, right. Secondly, if they were at all talented, then I would probably like them. But I don't. I hate them."

"I've assumed as much."

Laney was then telling me that Three Days Grace (who opened) were later on seen at the souvenir booths, handing out autographs. "I wish Nickelback would have done the same. It would have been cool to have Chad Kroeger's autograph."

"You didn't seriously think that Chad Kroeger, the incarnation of Christ on Earth, would deign to mingle among the common folk, did you?" I asked sarcastically.

"Well, you never know."

"Oh, I think I do, in fact. He'd have to climb down off of his royal fucking throne first. Then, even if he did that, it'd be quite difficult for him to greet the fans, as he'd have to pull his head from his own ass."

It has been decided that Nickelback shall no longer be discussed in my presence, as I become almost as unbearable of an ass as Mr. Kroeger himself.

Disclaimer: I don't want anyone who likes this band to be sending me messages, claiming "Nickelback rules, and therefore, logically speaking, you suck." It's my opinion, and nothing anyone can say is going to change it. So there. Same goes for you Clay Aiken and Hillary Duff fans.

Miss Black

Listening to: "Where Is My Mind?" by the Pixies.

Watching: Smallville. Mmm, Lex looks all sexy and cat-like in black.

»«


Site
Meter

Miss Black also contributes to a David Anders/Sark site under the name Chaton Espion. Feel free to visit her there if you'd like to witness the terrifying depths of obsession.

happiness is a warm gun